"Helloooo, everyone! Hope you're having a good afternoon, viewers - we've decided to take this programme to the Salt-Tea Cafe as we sit down for coffee!"
"Which is what we do every day, but whatever."
"And we start off with the biggest thing to start the Lunchtime news with - the latest in Hero Watch! And whilst most of these brave, selfless types that call themselves the Kobbers are rather elusive and hard to capture on film, our ink-redible team-"
"Oh, my Cod, you actually went there."
"-managed to do what no other news corporation has done until now! That's right - we've finally got exclusive footage of that brave, dashing, very-obviously-handsome-"
"Which is what we do every day, but whatever."
"And we start off with the biggest thing to start the Lunchtime news with - the latest in Hero Watch! And whilst most of these brave, selfless types that call themselves the Kobbers are rather elusive and hard to capture on film, our ink-redible team-"
"Oh, my Cod, you actually went there."
"-managed to do what no other news corporation has done until now! That's right - we've finally got exclusive footage of that brave, dashing, very-obviously-handsome-"
"Stick to the script, Callie, jeez."
"...WE GOT FOOTAGE OF OOO!"
"Yes, after actual weeks of trawling around with our hidden cameras, we managed to catch that mystery masked man in action. About time too, I say."
"And this, viewers, is what we saw!"
