The Lost RP Files - Rain's Drunk Tape

You may remember that a tape reading "Play this, dudes, it's hilarious" being delivered, yet getting ignored because of The Lord. Well, I can now exclusively reveal that it was a hilarious recording of a party that Rain and Ironheade had for the ninja's birthday, after IYM. In it, Nick realises his feelings for Stella, and Eddie yells something about eggs.

Enjoy!

*TAPE BEGINS*

“Kickstart my Heart” by Mötley Crüe is being blared over a speaker somewhere. Shouts and whoops are heard, as is the clinking of glasses and random thuds. There is a scraping noise as the microphone is adjusted.

Wasshup, mah… mah main men. Mah homiesh. It’sh yer ol’ pal, Rain, over at the Punchlesh Pavi… Pavlov… whatever it’sh called. I’m havin a… a blasht, that’sh what I’m havin. Thish party! It’sh off the… off the chain, off the hook, off the-

There is a crash of breaking glass, followed by a yell of “FUCK YOU!” Rain bursts out laughing.

F-f-f-Fire Baron’sh havin’ an argument with the wall about who’sh hotter - Shamantha Fox or Linda Lushardi. Yeah, we’re all pisshed, at the mo. We’re all... fuggin shozzled, that’sh what we are. Shept me, of courshe, coz I’m made of… of water. Headbanger, he’sh, he’sh trying to eat the couch, it’s hillarioush. An’ Bounsher’sh shpeakin’ in tonguesh and all.

A voice is heard: “Il concetto di gioco di ruolo come diversi personaggi di fantasia è ridicolo. Essa suggerisce una mancanza di…” It stops, followed by snoring. Someone shouts, in the background.

Jonshey, Razor Girl shaysh “a bluh-buncha bananash”. Dunno why.

Oh, Godsh, the wallsh are melting…

There is a sound like a thick drink being chugged. Eddie is heard to yell "I am the EGG LORD!” for some reason.

I jusht wanna shay, thu, tha, thanksh, you’ze guysh, for like, the besht birthday partiesh ever. Never had a, a propah party since… no, it wasn’t then, I wash only shixty-sheven at the time. Anywaysh, you’ze guysh are the greatesht. I’ve had a fuggin good time, and I really ‘preshiate what you guysh did. You’re all great. Even you, Jaxx. That blade fuggin rulesh. Besht pizza cutter ever.

And Shtella… if you’re lishtnin’ to thish… I think you’re really-

There is a cry of “DOGPILE!” from the Kill Master, followed by whoops, a scream and some thuds. The microphone clatters as it is knocked over in the ensuing chaos.

*TAPE ENDS*